OUR SCALLYWAGS

THE DUTCHESS

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 There is an old saying, “Only fools rush in where wise men fear to tread”. Apparently, no one bothered explaining that to the Duchess. She bravely leads this rag-tag bunch of hapless pirates in search of fortune and glory! Unfortunately, all they seemed to have amassed is mayhem and misadventure. A strong, willful leader, she is as quick with her wit as she is with her blade. She is the Captain. She is The Duchess, but only a fool calls her Captain Duchess...Yeah that fool would be Black Jack… The Dutchess, a person of noble birth, threw it all away to seek her fortune at sea. However, she soon realized that the only thing most of these pirates knew about the sea was that it followed the letter B. That, of course, is those pirates that can spell. 

BLACK JACK CALLAHAN

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  The ultimate hapless pirate, he has a very particular set of skills. He’s a man who can make anything a weapon, except his wits for here alas he is woefully unarmed. He has been mutineering...I mean bucannering with this fine crew for the past twelve years. If nothing else, this lovable dolt is persistent. The tall man, all in black will be seen stealing, losing, uncovering and once again losing treasure at any given moment. It’s frankly got to be exhausting being so consistently inept. He will continue to do so for the foreseeable future. 

KRYSTAL CARRUTHERS

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  She is a fierce warrior. She is daughter to the infamous pirate Kristoph Carruthhers, a man who single-handedly (with help) stole the Dragons Eye diamonds from the crew after a long and treacherous journey in which they laboriously found, lost, and found again the treasure. He raised Krystal to follow the many rules of piracy. Her father instilled upon her a set of rules upon  which she would carry herself. Unfortunately for Krystal, she didn't know that her Father didn’t really pay attention to, or actually know the rules and made up a slightly different version.  She quotes her “guidelines” with confidence and willingly backs them up with cold hard steel. 

JON SILVER

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  A runaway like Black Jack who sought his fortune at sea. Armed with the ability to sing, quote obscure things, and do a look what is now referred to as a “smolder” .. not exactly skills in demand. Remembering his parents constant haranging and belittling made him seek out the life of a pirate.  Seriously, how often can a man hear, “ Move along Jon Silver” “Sing a song Jon Silver” “ “Bang the gong Jon Silver” before a man realizes he doesn’t have a leg to stand on. He met the likes of Krystal Carruthers and was certain his luck had changed! He was certainly wrong. To this very day he is haunted by visions of something called a zombie and will often shoot anything he deems a “zombie”. Needless to say the crew isn't welcome at more than a few ports. 

THE CORSAIR

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  Sure it’s a fancy name for a pirate, but would you expect anything less from a man who is so impeccably dressed, and with such a manicured visage. In simple terms he's well dressed, but he has his own agenda, or at least did until much like The Duchess, he ran into this crew of misadventurers. He is always trying to play some sort of angle but of course this crew is as sharp as butter knives sooooo....The Corsair can often be heard lamenting that he is feeling his brain cells actually perish by engaging with the likes of Black Jack, Naga and Silver. 

STEPHEN McQUADE

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  This is the man that for years dedicated his life in the pursuit of hearing the sound of a silent clap by only using one hand. He soon discovered a higher calling, but instead answered an ad which called for brave seagoing men willing to face countless dangers and perils. Alas, he signed on to the ship next to that one. He has been the loyal first mate to The Duchess for the past six years, of at least two he is aware of and one he can remember. He is always eager to go on a treasure hunt, again, even though he isn’t always aware of it!  

BONNIE READ

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  Much like The Duchess she comes from a noble upbringing. With a fiery temperament, she’s quick to anger if she feels there is a better choice to lead this crew….namely herself.  She is a brilliant tactician who unfortunately is unable to read a map unless it has clear, pretty pictures on it. She is as quick to sing a tune as to fire a gun. She will join in any fight as long as she doesn’t have to. As a matter of coincidence, Bonnie once sailed under a notorious pirate captain named Clyde, who died under very mysterious circumstances. Coincidence? 

WILLIAM LONGSTRIDE

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  A man of letters and education. He has studied all the great philosophers of the modern world; Nietche, Socrates, Plato, Confucius. He’s well versed in Greek, Latin, and Mesopotamian. (Not even sure how he learned that one but..) He once deciphered the ancient ruins of an egyptian pyramid which inexplicably lead him to the Kings of The Coast. To be honest, perhaps upon reflection he should have studied more.  He has taken upon himself to be the Keeper of the Piratical code. He reminds his mates ad-nauseam of their slight infractions and misinterpretations of the code.  He is often stumped by the phrase TIBI OCCURNIT HAEC GUYS..which in translation means, ”Have you met these guys?” 

NAGA CARNAGE

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  An international man of mystery, he was chef to the queen of France.  He suggested that they eat cake, but save none for common people. He also claims that he once served the throne of Spain suggesting that Columbus should take a left when in fact he should have taken a right!  He now serves as navigator and voice of reason to this crew, both things the crew is lacking and actually even now still are.  A very curious thing has been observed by both the astute and obtuse among the crew. His accent, whilst vaguely french, disavows his utter disdain for French fries, French toast and French bread. He even said he would never eat escargot, as he would hate to kick a snail out of his house.  His questionable French pedigree was brought forward when a French poodle approached him and Naga bit the dog.  He is most assuredly a crew member to keep an eye on. 

QUARTERMASTER KARKAR

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  She never wanted to be a pirate. Don't believe us? Just ask her and she will say, “I don't want to be a pirate.” Some days she even means it!  She is likely to start a tune, or make sure we are singing a tune. After all, being a pirate is hard filthy work and singing and dancing is a must. She’s an ambitious one though and envisions franchising pirate merchandise extolling our many misadventures. 

BALTURD DEL VALHALLA

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Baron of Mesopotamian Steel and Master of Mediterranean Alchemy. Born of the High Mountain clans and taught by Marauders of the Northern Isles, descendants of the Ancient Gods.  Oden's only son that refused to do the wrong thing for the right reason, but instead pursed the right thing regardless of rules, laws or opinion. Ultimately, his quests led him to enlist with a band of friends seeking fortune , fun and future adventures. 

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